A bio, because...bio!

It's time for a new bio!

If your response to that is "I didn't know you had an old bio," well, that's one good reason for a new bio. My old bio, which has been on my main website for eleven years now, is...well, it's eleven years old, so I'm now going to update it. Plus, I think I should have one here on the newsletter so people who are encountering me relatively anew have some idea what I'm all about, so here we go! 

SCENE: A conference room in an office park someplace. Very Dunder-Mifflin. Sitting at the conference table is ME, a longhaired bearded man. I am wearing a white poofy-sleeved Renfest-style shirt under a pair of vintage blue denim bib overalls, and I am distractedly drumming my fingers on the table.

In walks THE INTERVIEWER, a middle-aged guy in a decent suit. He has a binder and laptop in one hand and a paper coffee cup in the other. Very Michael Scott. In fact, let's just say that he in fact IS Michael Scott. Michael sits down and opens his binder and laptop. I cannot see that the laptop is actually open to a YouTube cat video, but somehow I know that it is.

MICHAEL: Good afternoon, I understand you're looking to fill our open position for…[checks notes]...a writer, photographer, and dreamer. I didn't actually know we were hiring one of those.

ME: I'm well-suited to that position.

MICHAEL: I'm sure. Your name is Kelly Sedinger, and you live near Buffalo.

ME: Yup, the 716.

MICHAEL: Is it cold and snowy all the time up there?

ME: (sighs) Really?

MICHAEL: Sorry.

ME: No, actually, right now it is.

MICHAEL: And what was with those Super Bowls--

ME: Is this relevant?

MICHAEL: Oh, you all are still touchy about that.

ME: A little.

MICHAEL: So, tell me about yourself.

ME: Well, I was born in Pittsburgh in 1971. My father was a math professor and my mother was a teacher and a librarian. I have an older sister who is an English professor.

MICHAEL: That's a lot of teachers.

ME: Yup.

MICHAEL: But you're not a teacher.

ME: No.

MICHAEL: You're a writer, photographer, and dreamer.

ME: That's right.

MICHAEL: Writer, huh? Tell me about that.

ME: I write.

MICHAEL: That's not helpful.

ME: (deep breath) Sorry, I always feel weird talking about my writing. I write science fiction, fantasy, and supernatural thrillers.

MICHAEL: So, George Lucas, JRR Tolkien, and Stephen King?

ME: Uh…sure, if that helps.

MICHAEL: What have you written? Books?

ME: So far, yes! Five published, with more done and waiting for me to edit them.

MICHAEL: Wow. I read a book once!

ME: Great!

MICHAEL: What are your books about?

ME: Four are in a space opera series called The Song of Forgotten Stars. They're about two space princesses and their space pilot who find themselves stranded on a planet on the far side of the galaxy and now they're trying to find their way back. There's ancient prophecies, forgotten empires, six-legged talking bear-cats, talking spaceships, and all that. Oh, and there's love and romance and sibling rivalry and making friends with mean girls and that kind of thing.

MICHAEL: That sounds fun. What's the other book?

ME: It's a supernatural thriller called The Chilling Killing Wind. It's about a former cop who has to work with the ghost of one of his wife's three killers to stop the other two.

MICHAEL: Wow. And you have more on the way?

ME: Yes. Also, I've been blogging for almost 24 years now.

MICHAEL: Blogs? People still have those?

ME: Yup!

MICHAEL: OK, tell me about photography.

ME: Yeah, I've loved taking pictures ever since I was in college, and even though phones take great pictures now, I always try to keep a nice point-and-shoot camera on hand. Well, a few years ago I decided it was time to upgrade, so I started searching for good cameras online, and you know the algorithms, right? YouTube must have seen me searching for cameras and it flooded me with photography content. And that's when I suddenly realized how much there was to photography and how much I wanted to do more than just point and shoot. This was almost three years ago, and now here I am…I'm collecting photography books, I'm constantly studying photographers and their work, and I'm planning to upgrade my camera later this year to one with changeable lenses.

MICHAEL: What do you shoot? What kind of photos do you take?

ME: I guess I consider myself "interdisciplinary"? I love streetscapes and architecture and infrastructure. I love street candids (I don't like the term "street photography", it feels too limiting at times), and I love nature photography and landscapes. I love shooting flowers and plants. And water…I love taking photos of water, whether it's a tiny creek or a river or Lake Erie or the sea. Water draws me to it. Always has.

MICHAEL: That's interesting. What else?

ME: What else what? Like, what else do I shoot?

MICHAEL: No no, what do you do in your spare time?

ME: Oh. I read a lot. I love music and spend a lot of time listening to it. I love hiking and walking in cities and going to local nature parks.

MICHAEL: Pets?

ME: Three cats and two dogs.

MICHAEL: Wow. Married?

ME: Yes. Almost twenty-nine years!

MICHAEL: That's a lot.

ME: Not really. The secret is--

MICHAEL: Well, I think I have what I need here. I'll get back to you with my decision. See, I'm not sure Dunder Mifflin really has a spot for a staff writer, photographer, and dreamer.

ME: Weird, that's what the ad said you were hiring for.

MICHAEL: Yeah, but we didn't think anybody would apply for what we're really hiring for.

ME: Oh? What's that?

MICHAEL: We need a person who has an oddly encyclopedic knowledge of bib overalls. Also, someone with experience at pie-throwing.

(I stare at the camera, much like Jim always does. Cue the theme music and cut to credits.)

Please subscribe and stick around, folks!

Exeunt,
--K.